Friday, July 08, 2005

Willy Wonka and the Creepy Factory

Call me unamerican if you must.

Everyone seems to be quite stoked about the newest version of the famous "charlie and the chocolate factory" starring johnny dep. I have several friends who are REALLY looking forward to it. we're talking camping outside the theatre the night before excited. seriously.

i can't get myself beyond being completely TERRIFIED of it. hear me out. this utter horror of the film is, in my opinion, totally justified.

first, let's talk about the oompa loompas from the first film. basically they haunt me to this day. i kid you not.
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secondly-am i the only one who thinks that johnny dep (who i've never found attractive) looks very VERY creepy??? it reminds me of when jim carey played the grinch and i couldn't bring myelf to look at the movie poster much less see the flick. it's that disturbing to me.
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there are few things with which i'm unable to separate fact from fiction. this just happens to be one of them. i'm basically scared to turn on the television for fear of yet another commercial with johnny saying "you're weird" in the most haunting of voices. it's only a matter of time before he starts showing up in my already vivid dreams.

let's just hope no one does a remake of wizard of oz. those flying monkeys would be the death of me.

24 comments:

Bill said...

I'm not generally part of the "How dare you remake a classic" crowd (though the Van Sant remake of Psycho was pointless), but I'll make an exception in this case. The original Gene Wilder movie was just about perfect for what it was attempting to be. Still, I'll probably see the new one when it comes out on DVD, just 'cause I generally like Tim Burton's style.

On another note, are you and your hubby doing anything yet on July 30th?

Charlotte said...

The original was great, and just about perfect. But, if Hollywood is going to just recreate every movie it's at least a bit more interesting to tweak it a bit. I had heard that this Burton interpretation is more in line with the tone of the book. Which is darker and more quirky. I'm sorry the oompa loompas give you nightmares though.

rebecca marie said...

the original one was SO NOT PERFECT. sorry bill and charlotte, but i have to say no no no. yes, it was a wonderful movie, i own it and we watch it often, but it was so so so not accurate to the story. not even a little, huh-uh. okay, maybe a little.

i for one am very much looking forward to this version, as early on in the makings, rumour was Tim Burton stuck true to the book.

fingers crossed....

tabitha jane said...

hooray for being true to the book! i love tim burton films. i think johnny will do a great job with the willy wonka character too!

has anyone read charlie and the great glass elevator? the sequel to the first book? those pernicious knids are worse than the oompa loompas (so i don't recommend it to you breanna). my mom read it to us as a bedtime story when we were kids. bedtime might not have been the right time for that . . . but i just LOVE how all the granparents are in the elevator all "bedridden" and stuff . . . so great.

my favorite part of the gene wilder version of the movie is the song that goes "there's no earthly way of knowing which direction we are going . . ." the creepiness factor is the BEST!

i also loved veruka salt's song. i wish i had an excuse to learn all the words and perform it for something sometime . . . yeah right. like that would happen.

Breanna said...

Bill- i couldn't be more excited about the blogger picnic being back on. I don't know if i can convince ben to go (maybe if RM brings her fam) cause he's pretty shy and not so much into strangers (plus the part where he's completely uninvolved in the blogmunity.) but i will be there FOR SURE.

Tabitha- DUH! you could learn it and perform it for us at the BLOGGER PICNIC!!! perfect opportunity.

also...i was expecting someone else to have my freak out factor for the movie...i'm even more disturbed now that no one else is afraid of it...

rebecca marie said...

(okay, this may be all wrong, but i've no time to look it up...)

there's no earthly way of knowing which direction we are going but the danger must be growing for the rowers keep on rowing and there doesn't seem to be any sign that they are slowing is the grisley reaper mowing



i want a feast! (but veruca, you ate before you came to the factory...) i want a bean feast! (oh, one of those) Cream buns and doughnuts and fruitcake with no nuts so good you could go nuts! (you can have all of those things when you get home...) NO, NOW!!!

Bill said...

Wow, RM, either you've got the DVD paused with the subtitles on, or you REALLY know this movie!

I should have clarified earlier: I've never read the book. So, all my observations are based on just the movie. I don't know the tone of the book (though I've heard that it's much darker than the movie), and I don't know how closely the movie follows the book.

I first the saw the original movie back when I was like 4 or 5, and of course loved it. It was magical. What little kid wouldn't love a fantastic story like that? It's such a wonderful morality tale, and I think everyone can identify with Charlie, even if in real life they are more like Veruca or Violet or Mike TV. I'm told that back then I even kinda resembled the kid who played Charlie.

So ignoring the book (which I must, never having read it), I think the movie perfectly captures the feel that the movie makers were going for.

rebecca marie said...

c'mon, it's mike teavee....

oh, sorry, that's my psychosis coming out...

tabitha jane said...

my sister and i had the soundtrack growing up . . . we listened to it all the time but we always skipped the candy man song. breanna, THAT was the part that creeped me out! "the candy man can . . ." ew, i don't want the candy man to "can"

rebecca marie said...

here's what i always skip...

"cheeeeer up charlie...."

and that's all i know, cause at that point i'm furiously pressing the "skip chapter" button.

Nytro said...

The movie I pray to God they don't ever decide to remake is Watership Down. Was there ever a creepier movie? As I kid, I never trusted bunnies after that movie. I understand that Donnie Darko has elements of that, which is why I have boycotted that movie.

Watership Down ruined my childhood. And my Easters.

tabitha jane said...

but watership down is such a good book! the parts i've read anyway . . .

ooh! "cheer up charlie do . . ." also another good one to skip! it really doesn't get fun until "i've got a golden ticket" when grandpa and charlie dance around the bed . . . then the movie really begins in my mind.

Mandy said...

Hi! Sorry about the random intrusion, but...have you ever read the original story of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? Willy Wonka is actually insane and the Oompa Loompas are more Aboriginal Trolls (extremely creepy) than strange lil orange men.

Somehow I get the feeling that this remake is a step between the sugary sweet original movie and the often grotesque book.

BSC said...

You're not alone Breanna. These movies just freak me out. I'm a 24 year old male, and there is no way I see this one. Last one had me flipped for days when I was a kid.

Basically, the only way I see this if I drop a hit of acid on the way in. Don't think I'm going there.

I think it's due to the most heinous and evil creation of all time: the clown. Freaky, hidin under bed bastards.

Breanna said...

BSC:

I'm so glad i'm not the only one terrified of clowns.

and subgroup of people who can fit 40 individuals in a VW Bug is cause for concern.

tabitha jane said...

as a kid (and still today) i was DEATHLY AFRAID OF CLOWNS! at birthday parties i would seriously hide in another room while the clown did his magic tricks. at parades when the clowns came to hand out candy i would turn around and cover my eyes until they were gone. i was just FREAKED out by them! there is still that one clown that drives around in that gargoyle car you sometimes see at saturday market and he was painting the nordstrom rack store windows in clackamas one time when i was going to old navy to get my summer flips and i seriously had to take the long way to old navy so that i wouldn't pass this guy.

i also posted about a clown that seemed to be stalking me once here.

rebecca marie said...

that gargoyle car just drives me bonkers. it is sooo funny that you mentioned it. i was juuuust thinking about it this weekend, and was going to find a picture of it to incorporate into my blog somehow. yipes.

Bill said...

I saw an interview with that guy on some TV show once. His name is "Extreemo the Clown" if I remember correctly. And he had the weirdest laugh, kinda high-pitched and warbly, just like you'd expect to hear from someone just before they push you in front of the speeding MAX train.

tabitha jane said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BREANNA!!!!!

LET'S CELEBRATE WITH SOME CELEBRATORY SUSHI (not today of course since you are not here at work with me).

Charlotte said...

Happy Birthday!
And my dear, your questions are ready and waiting at my blog.

Seth said...

My favorite part of the original film was when they're all in the boat and Violet, who is picking her nose like there's no tomorrow, says "Spitting's a dirty habit," and Wonka looks down and deadpans, "I know a worse one." Bwaahahhahahahah!

(And yes, Johnny Depp scares the living crap out of me, too...)

Breanna said...

Seth: THANK YOU! Finally someone sees it my way.

i think that part of my hatred of the film comes from when i was younger and people said i looked "just like" the blueberry girl, to which i replied "before or after she turns blue and blows up like a baloon?"

Mrs. Andrea Wood said...

So- I don't read. I am embarassed to say that I didn't even know that there was a book.

I was so afraid of the first movie, I don't know about this new one and if the book is weirder and darker we'll have to see if I can make it through.

Breanna said...

alright, don't tell anyone (cause no one will check these comments anymore) but i did see the movie and it wasn't as horrifying as i thought it would be. so don't be scared andrea, you can do it.

i even cried a little. that charlie bucket is just so stinkin' cute.