Wednesday, April 30, 2008

life is like

a floppy worm.

i was outside briefly this afternoon while kaia, suffering from pneumonia, napped inside. i saw this little worm guy on the concrete. i couldn't figure out which was his head or butt, and where his underneath was. he was just flopping all over the place, trying to get somewhere shady to keep from dying in the (rare) portland sun. i mean, this worm, he was literally about one inch from a little shady weed. but it was two rolls one direction, flop to another direction, two took him nearly 4 minutes to get to that shady weed.

and i said to myself, "i feel like that lately." knowing WHERE i need to be, but having no clue how to get there, and not being able to get there in any sort of timely manner. not knowing which is my head or butt, where my underneath is. so frustrated to see my shady weed within reach, but just keep flopping and rolling.

it was at this point in my thinking that it occurred to me that if i had sufficient time to think this deeply about a worm, i ought to be in bed making up for last night's sleeplessness. but i keep thinking about the worm today. i'm tempted to take comfort in knowing that he finally got to his shady weed, but that feels way to cheesy, and i haven't had enough sleep for that kind of optimism.

isn't the goal "from glory to glory?" why do i feel like i'm going "from hardship to harship?"



Ryan said...

Hmm sorry to here the little ones sick, maybe you should get a vaume with a hepa filter.

Jenne said...

You commented on my blog today so I thought I would check yours out. You are a talented writer. Very talented.

Life in the first year or mommyhood is rocky, even for the most motherly types. I thought I knew what I was in for when I signed up for the mommy thing. I learned (very slowly) that I had a ton of growing up to do - and it was painful. I have another post about that ( It might continue to encourage you.

On a side note, your life of endless sleepless nights is familiar to me. Here's a book that changed my life: Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child by Marc Weissbluth. The first edition is the best because it is shorter (and what exhausted mom can read even one page more than absolutely necessary). I bet you could find a used copy online.

Take care.

LoriLoo310 said...

How is Kaia feeling? How are you feeling? You know you can always call me if you wanna chat. :) Hope you have a happy Mothers Day!